Wednesday, May 20, 2015

let me clear my throat

Life over the past few weeks has been hard, but really rewarding. It was the first time in a few months where my anxiety started to creep back into my life more consistently. It gave me an excuse to lay in my bed all day and ignore reality. Did that happen though? Nahhhhh here's the cool stuff I did instead of letting anxiety rule my life.

hockey in the rain!!!  I'm the really excited one in the pink shorts

The Jeppesens and I recently discovered that we are 5th cousins.

 I always wondered why my mom made this blanket so big. Now I know fit the whole fam!
Try to tell us that we don't look related.

bridal showers are really about the babies

the ten hour arm cramp was worth it

an eternity of DIS before your eyes lolzzzz

love sacs in pick up trucks + very genuine laughter = making Sean jealous

Sitting on Sean's bed, with his hats on + plus laughter = Sean being jealous

I've been joking (but like not really) with my friends that my new type of guy is single dad. I posted about it on twitter and got retweeted by a foundation for single dads lolololol

I mean I'm basically doing the mom thing anyway so why not make it official?

crappiest quality photo to go along with the best quality night
outdoor dinner with a view with Em at the Wakefield house

 Perk of being in my cool family, we got to go over to the LDS motion picture studio to see the murals for the new Provo temple last week. Get excited for the open house, because they are amazing

After we saw the paintings I randomly ended up spending three hours at gramma Mag's. We went through some boxes and found old photos. Here's gramps when he played for BYU football

I get paid to relive my childhood

we love sportz

Which cousin do you think likes hanging with me more? Kirk?

or Michael? 

Most darling performer at his preschool end of the year show. Imagine his cute little voice singing at the top of his lungs, while doing sign language, and you will understand why I cried from the cuteness.

Saturday was full of performances. Off to Taytem's dance recital

 airport pick up birthday celebrations

hide and seek

Jess's birthday

On Monday before work I went over to Britt's house to help her make cookie dough for Jess's birthday party. We had a really good talk. We went through her phone, and she sent me some old pictures from when I lived with her last year. She sent me this one, and I had to post it. There is something special about this group of girls. I feel different when I'm around them. Brittany and I were talking about it and realized that a group like this is really hard to come by. It is such a unique feeling that I get when I'm around them. They each radiate goodness and have a way of uplifting everyone around them. Every time I am with them I want to be better and have a desire to become the best version of myself. I majorly scored in the friend department

Happy extras:
- X-Men marathon with Emilee and comparing X-Men Days of Future Past to Twilight
-Breaking into apartments (which consisted of climbing through a bathroom window) in order to carry on our X-Men obsession
-My counselor ending our session today with "now go kick life's butt" 
-Max calling me when I'm out with my friends to ask me how to preheat the oven
-Changing the settings on my email so that I get notifications AKA knowing when Elizabeth is online on p-days so we can email back and forth
-Going over to the Davies' house and being lucky enough to get a Tami pep talk.
-Sushi date and Costco run with Allison. Guy working at Costco was from Africa and asked me if I watch the Bachelor. He then handed me the flowers that I was buying and said "will you accept dis rose?" He was also balancing a watermelon on his head. 
-Giving Emilee a thorough synopsis of Cats to which she responded "thank you for educating me"
-Testing out my medication for my hips by going on runs in the rain and discovering I don't hate running if it's in the rain
-Outlets with Hannah and still dreading the day that she moves away for a freaking year
-Full day with no anxiety at all. Kickin' this ish in the face
-Making a summer bucket list with Jayne that includes berry picking and flower crowns 
-Mom asking me about my new church calling "how did your little chat and chew go?"
-Trent telling Emilee and I that he enjoys hearing us talk to each other because we just get each other and speak the same language.
-BYU soccer game remembering the days when we would watch Steve play and now watching him coach
-Finding out Seth Cohen is going to be a dad

Wednesday, May 6, 2015

now what I spit, it's medicine for the sick

 Careful what you post on the internet cause your ex boyfriend's friends will see it and send screen shots of your blog to him...oops

 I told Emilee I REALLY wanted to start playing hockey. THEN I was in my parents' basement and found 12 hockey sticks randomly. Took them all to Provo. So yeah, I'm ready for the best summer of my life.

Kaile came into town. Ridiculous is the only word to accurately describe the three of us together.

still working on my camera ready face

23 years of friendship

face in the hole is quickly getting replaced


 recreating childhood jams on my keyboard 
people can make fun of me all they want for the excessive amount of blankets I have, but when it comes to sleepovers, I deliver

Sunday electric car rides around the neighborhood

one of the reasons why Sunday is my favorite day of the week

 babies and high kicks (and shorts under my dress)

 Last Monday was one of the happiest days. I got to meet one of my best friends in person. Chelsea and I have been friends for over a year now. We met through this blog and became instant friends. We have a lot of things in common and connected effortlessly. We have been there for each other through really challenging times and really happy times, even before we met in person. When we met we kept hugging and laughing. It seems like we have been friends for years and has been so comfortable. YAY for social media bringing friends together.

We obviously had to go to Sodalicious for her to get the true Provo experience.

We went to shops on center street and drove around Provo a little bit. It was basically the equivalent of a hometown date on the bachelorette. I'll have to venture up to Oregon for our next one.
again, very grateful for shorts under dresses

BYU creamery cause dating

 park with Brig

earning cool nanny points by driving home from dance with the top down

playing mom again

Steve and I rarely text, but when we do it's about the essentials 

Em slept over while I was staying with my sibs in Alpine. We couldn't still talk if I got in the shower... so I showered in my swimsuit so we could hang out

 annual mother daughter luncheon

Got to see MARK at Kayla's wedding

Emilee ditched living with me for living with Alyanna, so obviously I'm going to come between them

first of many rez days

DI/Target trip with Emilee and Rachel in AF

got cozy with 71 other people in Sean's apartment for the Mayweather/Pacquiao fight
so many bodies
so much sweat
so many strangers sticking to me
so happy when the fight ended

Big E is finally back from his study abroad so Hans could finally be blessed

Hans and his main chix

Trying to get Frank to love me more than Space Chimps

Max decided to pay the majority of this month's Netflix fee, because he's the cutest little brother there ever was. I usually only make him pay a dollar for the extra account, but he felt bad that I always have to pay the most. He also said he wanted to pay extra for our group mother's day gift because mom always buys him things. WHERE DID HE COME FROM?

Yesterday morning I was on cloud 9. I went to the Payson temple open house with Britt, Rachel and Lashea. It was meant to be that we all went together. We had the best discussions and talked each other through major decisions that we are making. I'm preparing to go through the temple (in 34 days!!!!!). I feel so blessed that I got to go through an open house as I am getting ready for that. Walking through I was so emotional thinking about how I'll be making covenants in the temple in just a few weeks. I was beaming and crying the entire way through. To add to that I was praying that if there was one of my grandpa's paintings there that I'd be able to see it. Sure enough, one of his paintings was at the top of the stairs as I got to the final floor. At grandpa's funeral we were counseled to always have a current temple recommend so that we can see grandpa's paintings wherever we go in the world. I am looking forward to being endowed and being able to see more of his paintings.

I am so excited to go through the temple. Over the past few months I have seen a change in myself. I know that I needed to make these changes in preparation for going through the temple. It's been the most amazing experience. I have been uncontrollably happy. Not to sound conceited or anything, but it's been really cool to hear my friends talk about the change in me. Some of the people closest to me have mentioned to me that I am noticeably different. They say I'm more confident, outgoing, positive and happy. They've noticed a change in my countenance, and it makes me so happy to know that. The gospel of Jesus Christ changes people. I have seen it change me. I was in this two year funk where I couldn't seem to pull myself up. As I have turned to God and really tried to make changes in my life, I have become someone different. I am more of who I want to be and who God wants me to be, and it has been the most incredible experience getting there.

To add the the happiest morning, we hit up puppy barn after the temple.
Life is so wonderful guys

Random side things:
-Got mistaken for a 19 year old and a mother of an 8 year old in the same day. HOW?
-"I'm like the next wonder of the world. I have an innie outie belly button and a 5 pack" -shirtless max flexing for me while he got ready for soccer
-Ryan telling Emilee and I that we are like Mary-Kate and Ashley aka best compliment we will ever receive
-Hunter getting asked if there will be cute girls where he's living in the summer to which he replied "nah, it's like vermont" and everyone in the conversation instantly understanding
-Gramma's reaction to me telling her about going through the temple (giddy squeals)
-Driving little girls in my home ward to gymnastics and secretly writing down all the hilarious things they said at stop lights
-Hanging with Hannah in Alpine on my bed and dreading when she moves to London in the fall
-Dancing with Josephine to Harlem in the the driveway when we got home before the song ended
-Starting temple prep class at church and getting even more confirmations that it's what I'm supposed to be doing
-Max getting in trouble for writing inappropriate words on my back during sacrament meeting
-Getting emotional over the kids I nanny for growing up. What's going to happen when I actually have kids??
-Overhearing conversations not meant for my ears being yelled near an open window when people didnt know I was outside and laughing about it for a solid 20 minutes
-"You should have honked at her but you were showing pictures of your cat" -McKay to Rachel after we almost got hit driving to puppy barn
-Mom coming home from Costco to tell me she has a surprise for me as she pulls Troop Beverly Hills out of the bag